
Da, asta e intrebarea in ultima vreme.Exact de cand copilul maraicios banuit de eruptie dentara , nu mai doreste sa doarma...nici noaptea, si nici ziua. Deja suntem la capatul puterilor,toti trei.Nu am mai dormit mai mult de 3 ore pe noapte de mai bine de o saptamana.Am incercat tot ce ne-a trecut prin mintea obosita .O fi prea cald/frig, poate il dor dintii, siropel de durere, gel pentru gingii, leganat, cantat, cu suzi si fara suzi .Deja suntem in pana de idei.Mai avem doua variante larg dezbatute , cu bune si cu rele.
Cry-it out, tradus de mamicile de pe la noi "dresaj", termen care imi provoaca deja groaza, de ce nu ,chiar greata.Dar aceleasi mame spun ca da roade. Pe scurt, se lasa copilul sa planga, singur ,in patutul lui, pana adoarme.Unii pot plange mai bine de 3 ore, daca ai noroc doar 15-20 de minute, timp in care nu mergi la el , nu il iei in brate , decat ii poti spune de dincolo de usa ca e ora somnului si el/ea trebuie sa doarma. Altii pot plange 2-3 zile, iar altii chiar o saptamana fara nici un rezultat.Cum spuneam , groaznic.
Cry It Out
Cry-it-out advocates make it sound so easy. A few nights of crying,
and your baby will be sleeping all night, every night. If only it
were so simple! My research has shown that very few parents experience
this effortless success. Many deal with weeks of crying for
hours each night (for baby and parent, in many instances). Some
babies cry so violently that they vomit. Some parents find that the
nighttime crying affects their baby’s daytime personality—making
him clingy and fussy. Many find that any setback (teething, sickness,
missing a nap, going on vacation) sends them back to the
previous night-waking problems, and they must let the child cry
it out over and over again. Many (if not all) parents who resort to
letting their baby cry it out do so because they believe that it is the
only way they will get their baby to sleep through the night.
Babies and young children are emotional rather than rational creatures.
A child cannot comprehend why you are ignoring his cries for
help. Ignoring your baby’s cries, even with the best of intentions, may
lead him to feel that he has been abandoned. Babies are responding
to biological needs that sleep “experts” either ignore or deny. It is true
that a baby whose crying is ignored may eventually fall back asleep,
but the problem that caused the night waking in the first place has
remain unsolved. Even if parents have checked to make sure that the
baby is not sick or in physical discomfort, unless they pick up the baby,
interact with him in a compassionate way, soothe him, or nurse him
until he falls back asleep, the underlying or accompanying emotional
stress will remain.
The most sensible and compassionate approach is to respond
immediately to your child’s cries. Remind yourself that you are the parent,
and that giving your baby reassurance is one of the joyous responsibilities
of being a parent. It is a beautiful feeling knowing that you
alone have the power to brighten your child’s life and banish fear and
sorrow.
Kate Allison Granju, in Attachment Parenting (Pocket Books,
1999), writes:
Babies are people, extremely helpless, vulnerable, and dependent
people. Your baby counts on you to lovingly care for her. When she
cries, she is signaling—in the only way she knows how—that she
needs you to be with her.
6 The No-Cry Sleep Solution
You know what it feels like to cry in fear or distress. It feels terrible.
And it’s no different for your baby. When your baby cries—for
whatever reason—he experiences physical changes. His blood pressure
rises, his muscles become tense, and stress hormones flood his little
body.
Babies who are subjected to cry-it-out sleep training do sometimes
seem to sleep deeply after they finally drop off. This is because babies
and young children frequently sleep deeply after experiencing trauma.
This deep sleep shouldn’t be viewed as proof of the efficacy of the [cryit-
out] method but rather evidence of one of its many disturbing
shortcomings.
Elisabeth Pantley- The no-cry sleep solution
De cealalta parte avem no-cry sleep.Mult mai blanda , aceasta metoda de a face copilul sa doarma explica si implicatiile psihologice asupra copilului.Si are logica.Imaginati-va ca mergeti la culcare ,aveti perna pufoasa, patura si pijamalele preferate.Deodata va treziti pe gresia rece din bucatarie, fara nici unul din lucrurile de mai sus. Mai puteti adormi acolo in conditiile alea? Acelasi lucru se intampla cu un copil care adoarme la san, cu biberonul sau leganat.Mai poate oare el adormi daca se trezeste in miez de noapte singur, in patutul lui?Totul e logic.
Nu-i o varianta usoara nici asta ,dar cel putin e mai blanda. Cateva din ideile acestei metode:
-copilul trebuie sa invete ca patutul lui e un loc placut, trebuie lasat ziua sa se joace acolo-asta ar fi aproape singurul lucru care ne-a iesit
-o jucarie de alint-nu e foarte incantat de ele, desi are trei in patut
-somnul de noaptea difera de cel de zi , noaptea e liniste, intuneric- si aici avem un plus
- o ora inaintea somnului, lumina difuza si joaca in liniste , eventual citit carti, un ritual in fiecare seara- nu merge in fiecare seara, uneori intram in casa fix inaintea somnului, sau copilul are chef sa sara si sa tipe exact atunci, dar ne straduim
- muzica sau sunete de relaxare folosite la ora de somn- nu merge , devine atent la ele si nu vrea sa mai doarma...am gasit insa niste sunete din natura care se pare ca nu ii atrag asa tare atentia
-diferite metode de a-l adormi- nici aici nu reusesc ,pentru ca adoarme la san. Si problema la noi nu este daca adoarme sau nu seara ci trezirile de peste noapte.
-ora de culcare desi pare devreme ,7-8 PM - am rezolvat si partea asta
-trebuie elimintae toate cauzele de disconfort- si aici e totul in regula
-copilul sa fie primeasca suficiente calorii peste zi, altfel se va trezi sa si le primeasca noaptea
Cateva ne-au reusit, cateva mai putin, dar perseveram in speranta ca da roade.Si daca cumva am sa aleg cealalta metoda ,stiu sigur ca ma voi uri pentru asta toata viata.